12 August, 2007

Loony lessons


Guess what I realised the other day? I've been on a non-stop roller coaster of learning ever since I was me. Be it the alphabet or 8 times 7 is _____ or how to put my hands through my sweater without letting the sleeves of my shirt bunch up, its been an incessant inflow of "stuff" into that convoluted grey jiggly mass of brain. And there's no stopping it. So, though you people have enough of your own learning to do, I couldn't pass up the opportunity to torment you into sifting through some of my own nuggets of wisdom.

I've learnt that I am happiest when I have a good book and a mug of coffee with me (yeah apple juice in summer will do just fine).

I've learnt that try as I might (and I HAVE tried), I will never understand what motivates girls to diet. My mantra: Have food, will eat.

I have learnt that no matter how old I get, I will never ever grow out of sties...yes those rotten things that come up in your eye (contrary to my mother's theory of them being a direct result of constipation, they are actually due to infection. Thank you).

I have learnt (in an incredulous oh-my-god-really? way) that I can survive without the internet. There are no such things as life-changing mails.

I have learnt that the hulabaloo about relativity is not over hyped. Think. The presentation you have to give tomorrow and have been going on and on and on about, will soon be over. Two weeks later you wouldn't even remember it. Ten years down the line you'l be battling bigger problems like poop-soaked diapers and half burnt dinners. Twenty years hence, you'll be busy putting up a brave face to middle age. Thirty years later...oh my imagination faints at the prospect of such remote time frames. That presentation tomorrow? Does it even figure in the greater scheme of things? We are just insignificant pimples on the rump of some ant floating across the Milky Way. So if you think things relatively, get used to the idea of being a blip, an inaudible squeak, a nothing of earth-shattering consequence and life becomes so much more simple.

I have learnt that although it seems exceedingly hard to believe (me being the lazy baboon that I am) I love walking. Especially in the mountains.

I have learnt that the vulnerability of old age in my loved ones scares me.

I have learnt that guys are good at the mushy stuff. Girls? Are not.

I have learnt that the following are the golden steps to cooking bhindi (lady's fingers):

1. Wash bhindi
2. Dry properly
3. Cut
4. Cook

Any other, ANY other, yes ANY OTHER sequence of steps (especially starting with 3 and then going to 1 will lead to sure disaster in the form of a gooey lump of ogre-coloured mush.

I have learnt that board games are fun. Always.

I have learnt that sometimes I enjoy wallowing in self-pity. Then I shake myself and get on with life, in a hair-out-of-face-sleeves-rolled-up way.

I have learnt that loud, garrulous families turn me off. Just as self absorbed aunties and their oh-my-dear-sons, manicured dogs, raisins in Indian sweets (read halwa, kheer), people who ill-treat books and new fangled pokemon/pikachoo cartoons do.

I have learnt that compliments are tricky fellows. I NEVER know how to deal with one. They have a way of turning your sincerely happy response into impolite modesty or nonchalance.

I have learnt that being honest with myself is the least I can do. For myself.

I have learnt that I'm going to be in this cycle of learn-forget-slap-forehead-relearn-aaah-that-was-it for a long long while.

Chandni

6 comments:

  1. o.O That should prolly go on the "about me:" on your orkut profile. Did learn a lot aboot candni singh tho :P However that small presentation tomorrow, is what might just determine if you or your maid is the one burning dinners :) and you get to say no to poop-soaked diapers too. relativity is all about the butterfly effect :)

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  2. I suffer from lack of creativity. I come to learn. In peace of course.

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  3. Lanky: yes you do suffer

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  4. Lanky8:56 pm

    Ah...I know. But as I said, I come to learn.

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  5. Introspection time, huh?

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  6. Anonymous2:05 am

    i learnt today that i can learn from blogs.. but my memory doesnt serve me well.. but that didnt stop me from enjoying what i learnt..
    Relatively speaking..the present is more important than the future..
    and presentations are bad(in every sense..even the relative sense)..

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