12 March, 2007

lawless love


Let her be the breeze
on your tear-stained cheek
let her be the sunbeam
for your sodden dreams
let her waltz through your thoughts
to a quirky tune
let her embrace you
the light of a moist moon

even when she prays for you
she flatters herself
to believe she has the power
to protect.to destroy.to love.to cherish
she ekes out happiness
from her miserly existence
narcissism casts an ugly shadow
over a pathetic tiny ego


I happen to have no idea whatsoever about where this came from. I was going through my diary and came across some lines I'd written long ago. Things in my head and those on the page suddenly coalesced to make some sense. Its a convoluted kind of poem. It just highlights that love is the most selfish emotion a human can experience. I am not against the concept of love...hell no I'm not. Its just that when people say love is about giving yourself away, about doing for another person, about seeing that certain somebody smile, the hypocrisy of it irks me no end. The other person? You love someone because of the way they make you feel about yourself, the way person you are when with them, the way you see everything through rose tinted glasses, the way you laugh and feel comforted with them. But there's no harm in that surely. Thats where the beauty of love creeps in. Its perfect to flaunt your selfishness. Its endearing to be possessive and protective. Its pretty to care for someone in an utterly selfish manner, its actually the ultimate form of self-indulgence. Its the one place where being anything other than yourself doesn't count. Yes that definately has to be the best part of love.

:)

17 comments:

  1. Anonymous8:57 pm

    These are lines from some song:

    "She’s got a blind smile and a soft touch
    A cute little dimple when she laughs too much
    They say you fall hard when you meet her
    Such is her allure
    She’s got a quick wit and a fast tongue
    But she doesn’t seem to know that she’s the one
    They say she cheats charm when she whispers
    She’s devilishly pure

    You’d see if you knew her
    She doesn’t know
    But its time I told her so...."

    ReplyDelete
  2. reflects Ayn Rand's 'Virtue of selfishness'. wonderful!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. ironically have just posted about an eternal giver!!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I totally agree with u,,totally and somehow what magic eye wrote was the first thing that came to my mind when i was reading it...the concept of The fountainhead and atlas shrugged.
    Its how u feel, matters the most.
    What person she gets out of u(becuase of she being herself) is very important, cause if u like urself that way, u will want to be in trance forever...and be nobody else...

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous11:17 pm

    very very difficult...

    murky, grey...i wish this were a beautiful thing...i KNOW this is a beautiful thing...and at times...MAYBE at times...maybe nostalgia gives me a gentle sponge bath when i am huddling on my knees...maybe...but this ...THING...is a line...is a thin line between seeing someone everyday, each moment, each breath the way SHE would want it...'helping' her live herself out...

    yes maybe THAT is selfishness...when ironically, YOU direct YOURself TOWARDS someone...when you alternate between gravitating towards her and falling for her at the same time...

    but you know what we forget???...that the half which is not ours is only their's...and someone will give you herslef in a way that she cannot recognize it and someone will just ask it back...

    damn...

    but a good damn...

    a beautiful lovingly lost damp damn...

    ani

    ReplyDelete
  6. Try listening to Shiver by Coldplay and you'll come to know what selfishness in love is all about!!

    At least for once, you try being a cynic as well!

    It's very much the glorified version of the self-indulgence you talk about.

    And by the way, Chiku still runs loose!

    ReplyDelete
  7. anon: "rushes" by Darius :)

    magiceye: love is the eternal giver. giver to thyself of course

    ani: the irony of it is the beauty. the willingness to bend and kneal at someone's fet for yourself, ah what can be more scathingly ironical than that?

    sid: cynicism? don't you think truth is a more appropriate word?

    ReplyDelete
  8. Lanky8:24 pm

    Both cynicism and truth are often confused for the other. Cynicism,when unbiased,takes the form of truth while truth might or might not be cynic. OK this is a bit confusing.

    Lets see.CYNICISM is critique of anything and everything.One might not be able to justify it but when one does, it is definitely the truth.So truth is in fact a subset of cynicism.We have to dig truth out....

    blah...blah..blah...
    scrap it...it was getting messy

    ReplyDelete
  9. chiku9:19 pm

    @spanky
    "CYNICISM is critique of anything and everything.One might not be able to justify it but when one does, it is definitely the truth."
    Justification can be based on flawed assumptions or wrong reasoning.So justification does not imply truth.
    And going by set theory Cynicism and truth may have some region common but none of them is superset and subset of the other.

    ReplyDelete
  10. chiku9:38 pm

    @Chandni
    Arent you being greedy?You are loving someone because of the way he/she makes you feel happy. But dont you think love needs to be unconditional?

    ReplyDelete
  11. chiku:
    a)tell me are YOU capable of loving unconditionally? what is "unconditional love" anyway? in my mind, no such thing exists and the very concept is based on a falsehood. you tell me I am greedy but each time you see a smile on ur loved one's face doesn't it make you feel a tad happier? doesn't the world seem slightly better? god a more real person? life more bearable? so after all it IS about yourself. the fact that another person is garlanded with your love and care is a conveniently beautiful side effect of love. people who talk of unconditional love are either lying to themselves or to you. to me, the greed of love is its moost endearing part: read my post on greed(http://bumblingbanter.blogspot.com/2006/11/greed-cupiditia-avaritia.html) you'l know what I mean.
    b) continue your dialogue with lanky somewhere else please.
    c) who the hell are you? come on a search party is on the lookout for you...your days of annonymity are numbered.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Sophomore11:51 pm

    Just for the heck of it.
    I won't argue much because I said the comment was getting messy.But I feel the need to justify myself.
    I know this is not the best place, but still.
    Justification based on false assumptions is not justification.It's rhetoric.Very much like sophistry.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Anonymous1:27 pm

    @Chandni
    1)I was not arguing with sophomore was just pointing out the reasoning which in my opinion was flawed
    2) You don't know me and i don't intend to know you. Just came across your blog by accident and found it very good. So knowing or not knowing should not make a difference.
    3)Mother's love for child is unconditional. Consider another case
    Suppose you happen to love some person and then go on marrying him. He makes you feel very happy and you are happy to see him happy. Then suppose he gets indulged in heavy drinking habit or narcotics , he is completely changed from the person you once loved.So do you stop loving him? He does not make you happy will you leave him ????

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  14. come on come on
    lets not even start on marriage

    and for the record, I'd get him to kick the habit (again because of MY greed....because "I" wouldn't want be in a house with a drunkard)..the "I" always comes in the way..that's why we are mere mortals.

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  15. Anonymous7:49 pm

    GOD DAymn homie..u write some ill(as in nice) stuff .. :P
    great work

    scintillating niggerish kid :P

    ReplyDelete
  16. from what i can figure
    this ain't no damn nigger

    :P

    joking sir, pulling ur leg to make u taller...as always

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  17. whoa ...
    speechless me. lol

    ReplyDelete

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